Pardon me for this entire post, because I'm just doing it to whine and de-stress (I don't think its going to help much, but I guess its worth a try.) because I'm tired.

Whatever happened to a student's job is to study? That's like, old, man. Now, students are expected to be able to handle CCAs, leadership positions and whatever rubbish they choose to put on their overflowing buffet plate. Or maybe, its just mine.

Apparently, this week was "everybody, talk to Jocelyn" week. I've had to like entertain so many people trying to get their ideas into me that towards Friday, I couldn't absorb anything anymore. So I'm feeling extremely apologetic to Mrs Goh, because I could tell I was zoning off.

But don't start pointing fingers at me, because talking to Ms Wong was really therapeutic and it was encouraging. I'm sorry to the rest who talked to me if I'm going to sound biased, but that's because I am. The reason is, she didn't try to give me any ideas. You know, there are just times when you want people to listen to you, but you don't need any more solutions, because you've already thought of so many ways to do it and you're so tired you don't want to think anymore. (All right, as you can probably tell, I'm getting a little delirious, seeing its close to 2am. ) But yes, I don't need any more ideas, any more ways to solve problems, any more thing I should be doing.

Maybe what Mrs Goh said is right; I AM getting triangulated, whatever that's supposed to imply. I feel like a punching bag myself, honestly.

And I'm glad Ms Wong understands; but I'm not sure whether I can live up to her expectation as "someone she wants the J1s to become". All right scrape that, I'm sure I wouldn't. Firstly, I'm not even focused on my studies, which is the main point of being a student. Secondly, I'm not as responsible as you think. So for goodness sake, stop thinking that I am and throwing me all that shit in my face. I'm not directing this to anyone in particular, honestly, because a lot of people have been doing that and I can't take it. I don't know how it happens, seriously. Can people who have worked with me convince those other people that I'm not as good as they think I am. Its a bloody facade.

And I AM very pissed with myself; for not being a 'fire' I'm supposed to be, for not being able to speak as well as I should, for being able to inspire but not. And I'm starting to doubt my interpersonal skills which I was rather proud of. My EQ is becoming, I don't know what, zero? I bet its from influence, damn you.

I honestly don't understand why I must be going through this. But if I think about it again, its going to go back to whatever happened before. Maybe you don't understand what this means, but it just means that I'm going to go into my downward spiral if I start this questioning thing all over again.

And I don't know how many times I absolutely must repeat this, that I can't wait to get out of HC. (Sorry to HC lovers, I do love HC, but I'm not very happy being here. Doesn't make sense, but who cares.)

And there are people I absolutely abhor. To the core.

Plus the fact that my mood is swinging like nobody's business, I'm even more hostile to these people than I usually am. Don't count on me on being nice anymore. I've been too nice (maybe you won't agree, but to me, I've reached my limits.) and these damned people are stepping all over me. Stop it. I'm not your bloody pet. I'm not obliged to share the same views as you, and I can't believe that you can't understand. I'm addressing people of my age as well as people older than me, so I'm extremely disheartened, because I expect them to at least understand, that people have different views and to put it bluntly, you don't freaking own the world.

(I'm trying extremely hard to suppress my anger now.)

I've probably never lost my temper with anyone, like, seriously. (Besides those times when my moodswings get the best of me and I just blow up without reason.) But I can safely say, since Secondary 3 I haven't been so angry before.

I remember fighting with Hern Hern over investiture banner. But I'm sure we both understood why we fought, because after that we could laugh over it and joke about how stupid we looked. And that's cause we both know that investiture mattered so much to us and we had to reach a consensus which we both think was acceptable.

But this, now, is an entirely different thing. I admit that you should know more, because you're an adult and should, by right, have more experience. But what you're showing me does not translate to that. It does not. We absolutely must do it YOUR way. When we make a suggestion, what I get is always "No, what I'm saying is...". Do you know how many times I rolled my eyes when I heard that over the phone and how many times I want to roll my eyes when you tell that to us face-to-face? Like, what the heck, we know what the hell you're trying to say, but we don't agree. You don't even want to give our suggestion a chance?

Damn you.

I can't believe I'm wasting my sleep time to make myself angry. And I totally lost the point of my post, but whatever, I'm prone to rambling and digressing.

I just saw someone selling Wacom Bamboo, pen only I think, online. At $110. Er, I can totally get a new one, pen and touch, for $179. And a new pen one for $129. And my resolution will be to get this at the end of the year. Like, right after A levels. So its going to be something for me to work towards. Which feels quite nice actually.

Oh and anyway, I was reading TIME magazine (the newest one), and they estimated that 95% of music downloads in 2009 were illegal. Which is quite amazing, actually.

I have absolutely no idea what was that paragraph for, but I'm trying ways to calm myself down.

Anyway, I think people are really selfish and disgusting. One moment, we condemn people for doing the wrong things, the next moment we're doing exactly the same. If you don't know (obviously you wont know), I'm talking about the SHINee autograph session.

People really need to stop finding excuses for themselves, and act all altruistic about things of value only to themselves.

Sleep. Sweet dreams to myself; I've had enough of nightmares in the day.

I think I'm extremely PMS-y, but I believe that's beside the point. And I'm quite sure this time it'll hurt like shit. I'm not kidding.

Which reminds me of Sharon's comment to Ms Teo's warped logic. "If calf cramp is because calf weak, then menstrual cramp is what weak?!" Seriously.

I'm turning 18 this year. Which is an extremely scary thought, considering what kind of adults I've met so far. I know I'm overgeneralizing here, but there are just some which totally ruined my impression. I hope I don't become like them: selfish, hypocritical and full of excuses for themselves. Honestly, some people I've met just don't act like their age.

I think people don't have to ask me to know I'm tired and stressed and whatever shit, they just look at my face and they'll know. The breakout on my face isn't a joke.

And I can warn everyone now. Please don't anger me these few days, because I'm, once again, extremely PMS-y. Especially if you're someone I already hate to the core. I'm in no mood to hide my hostility to you, if you piss me off. I don't care whether you know if you're pissing me off - I don't give a damn if its subconscious.

I'm extremely tired of things. A lot of things. Everywhere I am, there's something to worry about. And almost everywhere, there's something/someone that pisses me off.

A clue: I smile at almost anyone, but the people I can't stand.

I shall stop being power/fame hungry and stop being a leader when I'm not even competent enough to be one. I don't see anything good about me, honestly. So stop making me doubt myself even further when I can't match up to what others expect.

I need to be a little more selfish (I might already am.) and stop doing things I don't want to do.

I want to draw.

I am so glad I decided to do my work at Burger King after Fac dance practise today, because I'm currently slacking in front of the computer.

Actually, I'm quite tired now. I have no idea why I should be, seeing as I didn't do beep test during PE (phew, think I would have embarrassed myself there and then if I actually did it.).

I don't feel like training tomorrow. Actually, no. I actually mean I don't think I want to train tomorrow. No, that still sounds wrong. -.- But the main point is, my muscle really can't take any more stress. Fac dance practice almost killed my thigh, even though its nothing compared to training. I ended up not kneeling because I couldn't get up after that. That is, honestly, extremely dumb.

I've just sent the email regarding announcement to Ms Teo. I'm so sick and tired of talking to her directly. I'm starting to lose my control over my emotions and expressions when I'm around her lately. Either that, or she's over sensitive to what I'm showing her. If you ask me, I'm being extremely nice to her. Honestly.

My eye candy was in school today! That was a kind of good way to end the dry day. But I'm surprised I actually didn't fall asleep the entire day; darn proud of myself. And I've completed my first math tutorial of, erm, JC. Nice.

I need to come up with a study plan. Like, really soon.

Anyway. I think my weekends have been the most fulfilling one since I entered JC. This is the only weekend probably that I managed to do work on BOTH days. But I totally know, I got to keep at this rate, if not I'll say goodbye to my As for As. Nice.

Well. Actually I'm quite in the mood to blog about netball, but er, I don't know where to start. Its really .. complicated. Sigh. Oh and I'm quite pissed still. If she dares ask me about it, I'll do something really mean. If she wants to play it this way, I'll jolly well play along.

Seriously. What does me being a captain mean to you?

I miss Sharon. Haha. I feel weak and kinda helpless actually, even though she's around to help and all. But I know I'm not doing a very good job myself, which is making me a little angry with myself. Please keep going.

If you haven't already noticed, I've been cutting down on the Singlish in this post. Quite a feat, isn't it? I think I'm not doing too badly so far. This shall be my resolution for this blog, seeing as I've reached a magnificent 700th post.

How many days do M1 consider as a month? I'm sorry, but I really can't wait to get my phone.

Another torturous week to get through. Go me.

Oh and I've realised something extremely exciting. I think Junsu is a left hander! But he writes with his right hand! Oh my gosh, that got me hyperventilating for a while there. He held chopsticks with his left and threw a ball with his left. :D I'm extreme exhilarated (alliteration, huh). Really, I am! :D That's going to make me happy for quite a while there.

I just remembered, I don't think I'll get to see my eye candy anymore, since SATS are over. ):

Anyway. If you know me well, I'm not a person to blow my top off over small things. But seriously. Based on my reaction today, you totally could tell that I've never been so pissed before. So pissed until I had to swear. Seriously, I have never done it before.

I'm tired.

This is gonna be a short post, because I've got tons of revision and work I've got to do.

This week has been a rather killer week. And I've been sleeping in lessons like nobody's business. I think the teachers are just too nice to wake me up. Damn. I've got to invent some way to keep myself awake. Any suggestions?

I've been reaching home close to 9pm/10pm everyday. Damn torturous please. Physically + Mentally tired. Zzz.

I freaking can't wait to get a new phone. My phone is another thing driving me nuts okay. Seriously. Its lagging like nobody's business, the alarm is screwed and I can't stand waiting for it to load. Damn irritating please.

I shall stop whining here.

Orientation's coming. Seasons' coming. Block tests coming. Bloody hell. I don't know how I'm gonna get past this.

Anyway. My EC is perma in school. Haha. Nice. Makes me really happy. :D

Anyway. Recalled an article from I and I, actually. I personally think I'm a good manager, but not a good leader too. That's quite sad, if you ask me. Because I know I'll never be as inspiring as people whom I admire alot.

I think I've got lots of this to credit to my personality, actually. And I can finally conclude, that water personalities don't make good leaders. At least for pure water. Maybe really good supporters, but not leaders. That's my conclusion anyway, so feel free to have your own opinions.

Okay had enough of dissing myself.

Tomorrow's another long day with informals. Jiayou me.

I'm not gonna hand in the revision booklet. Duh. I'm only at chapter 2. Freak.

Let me just wallow in self-detest for a moment. I don't think I can do it. As you can tell, I'm really nothing close to what we had before. Like, seriously. I'm like, failing really badly. But don't worry, I won't stop here. I'm trying, trying, trying. Hopefully you see. I hope I don't let all of you down. :S

Okay that's all. Shall not take too long in that stage. Because I've got to pick myself up and go on. And sad to say, its not part of my goals or anything. I've got to get my own priorities right, and I've got to do the things that's gonna bring me there. Sorry if I disappoint you, but anything else, I'll do them, just not with the passion and rigor I treat other things with.

Was just thinking while showering. Sometimes, I realised everything I do wasn't ever in the plan I had for myself. Okay, I probably have to admit that I didn't have a plan, but I'll take it as the "normal" way. Oh but I just have to accept that I'm not smart enough to surpass that in typical way NY and HC grooms us too. So I'll have to do it another way. Haha. How pathetic. But it got me thinking about something from GP long ago (or was it language arts in NY?), about the Singapore plan and Singapore dream. I think its time we start thinking, really. We're like, going on 18. Which is a really significant marker, if you ask me. Like, when you were young, how many times have you envisioned yourself being 18? And the next marker will be 21 and poof, we're adults. Gosh. Everything happens damn fast, don't you think?

I think the fatigue is making me a little incoherent here.

Sometimes, I think whether I have too much on my plate. Maybe I do, because I'm feeling drained almost everyday. But I don't believe it. I've been through more in Sec 4, if you ask me. And I managed to do well in my studies too. Apparently, HC is another realm of a whole new different level. I'm struggling to accept my 1/30 in math. And being the competitive person I am (at least competitive to myself), I don't want to let my years of hard work in mainstream education go to waste, no matter how much I find no point in doing the things I'm doing. And that's one option they left out in the recent survey they had during math lecture.

I'm really tired. And I'll keep to my promise to myself and sleep. Now. Its 11pm. Nice.

Anyway. I think it was great. Haha. Because I managed to go to Lasalle's Open House. Nice nice. :D Dropped by NAFA's open house too. Sorry, but the lift pissed me to no end. The lift doesn't go the 4th level, where the exhibition for design and media is! So dumb. The I go there is for what, you tell me. o.O

Oh, but study-wise, was quite fail. Hurhur. As usual yah. No, but really, this week onwards it will be intensive studying. (I hope.) Can't imagine how it will be like when seasons start. :S

Carnival is pissing the hell out of me. I want to box the someone already. Actually I've got tons of people I wanna box. For one thing or another. And they freaking haven't send me the money. Bloody hell. Got money big deal ah. -.-

Its 2am. Hurhur. I just got reminded of Breathe. Lol. But er no, its really 2am. And I'm going to sleep.

Woohoo. NY girls are coming in tomorrow. :D Haha sorry, I've got no interest in high school guys coming in. Means we'll have a lot of people at squash courts. Yaype.

Okay. Goodnight. -.-

Got a shock when I saw the price of Omnia II with M1 plan. Bloody hell. Its $398. Like real I want to pay for $400 for a phone with plan. -.- But there's the take 3 thing. Which I don't really understand. -.- Haha, reminds me of inflation (cause when we pay the $200 two years later surely the value would have dropped?) Whatever. But I think its really nice. Who wants to donate to my Omnia II fund. ):

Arg. I have decided I shall clear the cupboard another day. Haha.

My mum totally went to update my passbook and got a bloody big shock. Oops. Told you I was spending too much. :S

Now, I got to think how I'm gonna come up with the $150 I need to pay on Friday. Hurhur. I currently have $126 in my savings. Oh my. WAIYEE, I NEED MY $20! Haha. Thank goodness for money from fac breakfast. If not I'll be $50 short somemore. Now, I need to find a better way of getting money.

Er. Like real I will want to give you my blog address. Who knows what you'll tell my mum. -.- You think I'm stupid isit. I don't give a damn if you find out on your own, oh wait actually I do. If you really do I'll make this blog private. Too bad for all my unknown readers out there. But I'm not into letting you get into my mind. And stop trying to talk to me on Facebook. -.-

I'm just sianed. And disgusted, as usual. At how people can be so double-faced, or however its actually called.

Moving on to a lighter topic. I THINK I CAN CHANGE PHONE THIS MONTH! :D My phone is pissing the hell out of me. Its like, BLOODY slow. Sorry, but I've lost confidence in Sony Ericsson. I admit, they've probably the nicest phone designs ever (and some really hideous ones, which attempt to look artistic but no, they end up looking plain alien.). But mainly they've pretty much maintained the standards. However, it gets on my nerves when it lags, even by a few seconds. It never happens with my iPod, so I obviously don't expect it to happen on my phone. I'm looking to get Samsung Omnia II! :D The only downside is probably its bulkiness. :( Otherwise its pretty much perfect. Although I don't know what's with so many people against the OS. Haha. But after a try with O2 (is that the name?) two years ago, I kind of think WM is quite ugly. Haha but I saw the review, and apparently it turns out to be quite chio after Samsung masked it over with their own Wiz thing. Quite cool. I'm so gonna be counting down to the days I get my new phone. :D

Wow. I've finally done my part for Econs, after dragging for so long. :S And its time to work on I and I. Haha, its been zero progress since, er, school started. Lol. To think I actually wanted to hand in today. Silly me. Like real I can make it. And there's Econs tutorial tomorrow. Please tell me the review doesn't have to be in then.

And there's Chem lab. Meaning what?! Need to do the bloody assignment ah?! Hello, I NEVER TOUCHED IT. Thanks Mrs Lee, I totally thought I escaped it because I got a freaking D. But no, she wanted the whole class to do it. Well done.

Oh. So today was open house. :D I TOTALLY MISS DANCING THE FAC DANCE! :D Still remember how high we were over it and how enthu we were in going for practices even though we practically had all the moves in our heads already. And its nice seeing young people coming in. Although all I've seen are, er, NY girls. Haha. (Why no high school guys ah?) So anyway, GOOD JOB TO COUNCIL. :D I think they've been doing a lot of, er, saigang. But yes, I think I really respect their commitment and all. :)

And training's tomorrow. MEANING I CAN GO FOR OPEN HOUSE ON SATURDAY. Haha shit I sound like some sec 4 please. And I realised NAFA is also having open house. Hmm. Oh I wonder whether they're gonna hold talks for Lasalle. Damn, I'm getting excited. Haha.

But before that, let's get this I and I business over and done with. Goodbye sleep.

Haha yesterday was emo post day, as you can see. Feeling a bit cranky, as you can see.

Tomorrow's open house. Kinda excited. Lol.

I'm tired. Its 1.34 am. SLEEP.

Fine, shall go to Lasalle open house on Friday instead. Irritating. Shall change clothes and act like I'm Sec 4. Haha if not look like some retard there. Roar. I am jealous. They have this portfolio training for non-art applicants for foundation course. Its $290, marked down from $360, during open house. But damn, its for 2010 intake. Hopefully they have something like that next year. Oh wait. I just realised its a two day course over the weekends, cause the third day is interview day. DAMN. I wanna go. :(

And roar. Econs is driving me nuts. -.- I suck. Seriously.

I know how much I said I just want to get out of Hwa Chong. Haha. That remains actually. Even after I am clear headed, I still think I'll be better suited somewhere else. And no matter how much I convince myself that, after I struggle through this year, I will be able to do things I want to do. Oh. But its the start of the year and I feel like giving up already. Math test today totally didn't help. I'm probably gonna get a big fat zero.

Haha. I'm trying very hard to remain optimistic and positive, but oops, not working too well. :S For one, I don't believe in such thing as no limits (sorry, jiao lian). But that's like, my philosophy. I'm not denying its whole existence, but for some things, there are just points where you reach and can't cross. Or just don't want to cross. For once I think the I and I article about education makes a lot of sense to me. Haha.

Interest is really really really important. Sad to say, I've got zero interest in finding out how much the economy will improve by and how are oil prices gonna fluctuate further. And close to negative interest to find out the vector equation of a freaking plane. I'm just not wired to do these things okay. -.-

This kinda gets me worried about my A levels. Haha thinking too far, I know, but that's the only thing I'm looking forward to now. Or at least for it to be over.

Oh my. I think I need to spend more time in school doing work than thinking about this sort of rubbish at home. :S

Just had a sudden thought. You know how people say its good to have a goal in mind? Its true. But if your goal just isn't gonna be met by what you're going through now, there's no point to it.

Ah. I'm sharing the same sentiments with Dr Wang. I kinda hate HC. As in no, I really really love the people and everything, but its just, not me. Haha. Apparently I think I'm more of an ah lian than anything else, if that's what you want to hear.

Maybe because I'm not an adult yet, I have no idea how tough it is to be working. And I've lived a damn sheltered life so far. Seriously. I rarely do housework, I get the things that I want, I'm studying in a good school. What else can I ask for? In the end, I'm turning out to be some materialistic spoilt brat. This really isn't what I want. The meaning of life comes from the struggle. Yea, you may say, the struggle comes later. But I need to prepare myself at least, and I'm not getting that now.

Aiyah. The main point of this post is actually this. If my parents gave me a chance to get out of HC and go do something I like, I would totally jump at the chance. Irresponsible and spoilt, yes. But I've had enough of this sheltered life. (Haha, shit, there's people who'll totally want to be in my position.)

You know what I'll rather be doing now? I'll rather be studying art, dance, other languages and holding a part time job. And not sitting in front of the damn computer and fretting about how Singapore solved the unemployment problem, oh, which was nonexistent during 1970s, which means I'm doing nothing. And worrying about Bio holiday assignment, which I stopped at question 2 before I utter conked out at Li Ying's house. And stressing about Bio test. Oh and who can forget about I and I. Utter greatness.

Please tell me I'm not dreaming when I say I want to pursue art. No matter how talentless I am. (Okay wait, I refuse to admit I am talentless at it okay. At least to myself, I can meet some standards of my own.) Right, I probably won't ever end up at the top of the industry. Haha, I've seen people from around the world, who are like, so much younger than me, producing works I can never achieve (so far, at least). But I just want to do enough to make my own life MY OWN. Is that too hard a target to meet? So what if I'm untrained for like, the first 17 years of my life? Haha shit sounds like some sob story.

Read the blog of someone I look up to alot. Went back to the post which inspired me quite a bit. And I think my feelings haven't changed.

Haha. Ms Wong's 'trailblazer' suddenly popped into my mind. She reminds me a lot of Ms Yeo Pih Tai actually. Just the feel I get, that when she talks to you, she is talking to YOU and no one else. Really makes you feel loved. And I'm so glad Ms Yeo's going back to NY. Miss her so so so much. :D

Okay I'm digressing alot from my initial topic actually. And this post actually took me 1 hour to reach here. Like, wow.

I just spent another hour digressing elsewhere actually.

And sorry, I haven't done a single piece of work since then.

I know I'm cutting myself a lot of slack. I don't know what I'm expecting to happen. Haha. Seriously. I should just give myself a punch in the face.

I think I need to go back on medication. Feeling a bit nuts right now. Think its the lack of sleep.

I'm quite tired now actually. Hurhur. And I need to wake up in, er, 4 hours. Nice. Shall bring my netbook to work on I and I tomorrow.

Its 3am now. Hurhur. Shit me. ><

Am I glad I scrapped a D for Chem so I don't have to do the bloody worksheet.

SHIT WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST TWO MONTHS.

MUG MATH. Goodness. Pray hard I get 10 out of 100. -.-

LASALLE IS HAVING OPEN HOUSE ON 15 and 16! :D Haha cool shit. But I kind of think I can't make it for both. -.- Thanks to training being 12 to 3. What crap timing is that you tell me.

I. Am. Sianed. The thought of going back to school is just ... sian. Haha. To no end.

I know its one last grueling year before I can go do something I actually enjoy. Like art and languages. Seriously, if I don't make it into design I'll probably go try my luck as a translator. Haha.

Hui Kin just told me that my photoshop keygen has trojan. Oops. Apparently, that kind of reminds me that I haven't scanned my computer since forever. And it sucks not having an antivirus. So I just went to download one. And it looks kinda bad so far. Haha. Dang.

Okay. Off to do work.

And someone out there hates me. -.- I think there's chewing gum or bluetack on my photo on netball board. Sadness. ><

Reading news on CNA website now. Apparently everything is getting epic high-tech now. Like, there's talk about 3D televisions, natal Xbox 360 (which I personally think is a ripoff of Wii), slate computers and what have you.

And there seems to be cool stuff at M1 Fringe Festival. :D "___ Can Change" sounds kinda cool. "Lyrics from Lockdown" too. Who wants to go with me! :D I shall go buy tickets from Jurong Point. Haha. I'll probably only watch "___ Can Change". :S Poor kid. And I wanna watch Breakout too! Roar.

Okay I am tired. SLEEEEEEEP. :D

And I've been doing a lot of useless stuff. And my homework progress is still 0%. Oh. My. Shit. I am so not ready for school. :S

And I'm smiling like some shit woman in front of my computer. Hahaha. Fangirl moment! :D I think I could break a glass if I squeal in happiness right now. :P

Roar. I need to get off the com. Like, seriously. :S Please save me. :S

Training camp's tomorrow! Doesn't feel like a camp, cause we're not sleeping over, but the schedule looks promising. :D

Hoho. Jaejoong has the same hand fetish as me. :D Lol. Randomness. And yes, I still have a fetish for hands. :D IDK why yah.

Can't believe we're starting school. -.-

PEOPLE, BUY MY STUFF. I NEED MONNNNNNEY. ):

I have reached a stage I need to sell off a lot of things to earn money for what I'm buying, because at this rate, I'm gonna be BROKE. So my blog has now become a marketplace, because I don't think SGClub is gonna help much. Okay wait, maybe it will. Haha. But I'll have special prices for friends. Oops. And I am damn desperate for money. :( Sad life huh. Anyway I need to clear out old stuff to make space for new stuff too. Haha. So I don't really care. Okay fine I do, because some are my treasured possessions but yes, I really need to sell them off.

And by the way, I saw HC people selling their lecture notes on SGClub as well. Er. I guess they are as hard up for money as me and are trying to get rid of their stuff in the best way they can.

So here goes nothing:

Chinese CDs

1. 潮男正傳
2. 無所不在
3. 雙面飛輪海
4. 沉默的瞬間
5. 第五季
6. 太陽
7. 飛行部落

Movies

1. 200 Pounds Beauty
2. Gigolo Wannabe
3. My Wife is a Gangster 3
4. Paprika
5. Ponyo by the Cliff
6. Detroit Metal City (DVD)

CDs

1. Tennis no Oujisama Original Soundtrack 1 & 2

Anime

1. Gokusen
2. Bartender
3. Mouryou no Hako
4. Princess Princess
5. Junjou Romantica 2

Japanese Drama

1. Puzzle
2. Glory of Team Batista
3. Bloody Monday
4. Maou

Manga (Chuang yi)

1. 魔法零蛋 Mx0 (1-10 end)
2. 超能力少年 (1-7 end)
3. 少年偵探迷宮傳奇 (1-8 end)
4. 貓街 (1-8 end)
5. Placebo (1-2 end)
6. Speed Grapher (1-3 end)
7. 丑小鴨王子 (1-6 end)
8. 絕對男友 (1-6 end)
9. 超人氣Honey ! (1-3 end)
10. 惡魔愛上我 (全)
11. Love Tripper (全)
12. 我的愛情魔藥 (全)
13. Crazy ManiaX (全)

14. Deathnote (13 – How to Read)
15. 最游記Reload (1-6)
16. 疾風守護者 (1-12)
17. 黑道大小姐 (1-5)
18. 金色琴璇 (1-4)
19. 龍族花婿 (1-3)

Manga (Taiwan)

1. 偵探守則893 (1-3 end)
2. 是誰聲如啼血 (1-3 end)
3. Doll Masters (全)
4. 血之伊甸園 (全)
5. 玩命游戲 (全)
6. 心靈偵探八云 (1-2 end)
7. Duds Hunt (全)
8. Dust (全)
9. Re : Life 超異能感應 (1-3 end)
10. 世界末日與黎明前 (全)
11. 傷 (全)
12. 郵走陰陽界 (全)
13. 東京特務組 (全)
14. 失蹤Holiday (全)
15. 流轉之風 (全)

16. 小侍女大千金 (1-2 end)
17. 巧克力戰爭(全)
18. 美少年咖啡廳(全)
19. 熱情意大利餐廳(全)
20. 蝴蝶(全)
21. 蜜糖公主 (1-2 end)
22. 帥哥醫生抱抱(全)
23. 心動初吻(全)
24. 井之頭高校Beasts (全)
25. 少女的才能(全)
26. 優等生的戀愛模式(全)
27. 偶像天堂(全)
28. 蜜糖兄妹(全)
29. 極道王子(全)
30. 好逑情人夢(全)
31. 蝶戀之夏 (1-2end)
32. 歌姬(全)

33. Doubt (1-3)

Was on the lookout for shows to watch. And there's Breakout 2010! :D LIKE OMG. I missed the 2009 one, but this seems to be promising. But I probably can only afford the $28 one. -.- Or maybe $38 with student concession, hurhur. WHO WANTS TO GO! :D Its from 12 to 14 March. Sounds damn bloody exciting.

And there's also this Liao Zhai Rocks! thing. Haha sounds cute.

Roar. So the year has passed and alot of things have happened. Haha, how come this sounds more pessimistic than I thought it would come out as. Anyway, its been er, 2 hours since I started this post. Haha apparently I got caught up doing other stuff.

2009, for me, has been quite a bad year, if you could already tell. Haha. Let me just list down random stuff I can think of, and since its a new year, I shall do it in a way I haven't done before.

1. Braces. :D Like, finally. After being promised but put aside because I just kept going overseas and the money set aside just kept getting used up. :P

2. Lots of Xrays. Like, nothing serious happened, but this has been like, the most dumb year I've ever been. With Wai Yee, we're like, the injury duo. Although she seems to get it a lot worse than me.

3. Plans for future. At least this year, I have actually decided what I wanna do in the future, which is something good actually, since I have been undecided until that episode in June and all that shit I went through to get to this conclusion. Haha.

4. Screwed up studies. Oops, no excuses. :S

And stuff I've been involved in.

1. Netball: Well, I think this has been keeping me sane all this while actually. Like, for the entire year. But I kinda lost passion for it during a period of time. Fine, I kinda lost interest in anything then. But I'm so glad to have netball, and my teammates. Its gonna be a new team this year, and as much as I miss our seniors, I look forward to playing with this team under Ms Lin. I'm not being politically correct or anything here. And pray hard our carnival works out! :D

2. 09S73: My lovely class. :D I agree with what Ms Wong said (during our chit-chat session, which evolved to gossip session eventually :P), all the people are very down-to-earth. And simply put, I LOVE YOU GUYS. :D And for cooperating with me and listening to me zihai in front of yall everytime. :D I hope I haven't made yall deaf after all the loudness throughout the year. Hope we'll have a great year ahead. :D

3. Fac comm: I don't know how much I have to apologise before I can start feeling like I've made up for it. :S But I really thank you guys for tolerating with me and my disappearing act. :S

4. NYSC: Hmm. It was a tough decision (believe it, ask those who know. Oh probably no one does.), but since its over, I can always talk about it. I didn't intend on joining this year's planning for December camp, because I was really worried I couldn't take it. What with the stress coming from people I work with and all, I wasn't ready to face some of the people again. Haha, but I guess Wai Yee was right in talking about my personality. Even if I don't want to do it, I will, and at the end, I'll complain about how I could have done better. I kinda forced myself to take it on: screw me and my pride, hurhur. But I'm quite happy that I did actually.

Although I can say I did lesser than I'm supposed to, so I really want to apologise to Hern. I don't think she'll see this though. Like, throughout our entire Council term, even after that, like during December Camp, she has always been the one doing most of the work. I'm serious. I'm such a useless pres please. ><

Anyway. Moving on. I think I've gone on quite a bit about this year actually. In summary, I kind of think its been a not bad year in terms of my emotional growth actually. Haha. I seem to cry less now. That's kind of good actually.

For next year, I think its going to be mugger year. :( Sad and no life. Oops. So I can't wait for next year to end actually. Its a bad way to start a year thinking this way, but there's no better way to put it. :S So good luck to me and all those taking important exams next year. We'll all be free after that. Ms Wong and her TRAILBLAZERS. Haha.

Hmm. Any resolutions for next year? Haha not like I'm likely to follow them anyway, so I shall not. And I'm such a lazy slob I won't even think of them. Oops. But I kinda have an idea of what I wanna do after As actually. Haha. Like, learn Japanese (oh, after the two damn years of learning and another three years after of not using it frequently, I'm suspecting how much is retained in my brain.), learn Korean (haha, wish me good luck. :D), learn dance (mm, which has been on my mind since I don't know how long.), learn guitar (oops, its rotting in my house. :S), learn art (big hearts. :D). Sounds kinda over ambitious actually. Oh and I need a part-time job. Totally. And my mum is not into me taking up part-time jobs, which I have no freaking idea why. Shouldn't she be happy that I, for once, do not need to take money from her? Apparently she has this really weird mindset which I can't comprehend. Shrugs.

I can't believe you read till here. Haha. Hows this utter crap for you?

Anyway, I spent the last few hours of 2009 with Qian Wen and Li Ying! :D Haha first time counting down with friends leh! I'm so pathetic. Hahaha. But yay! We played with SPARKLERS! :D Deprived kids, yes, but hey, its damn fun please. :D And Qian Wen's camera is THE OWN. :D Hope she uploads the photos soon. :D And Li Ying sucks at watching movies. Hahaha. Out of the three movies we watched she finished NONE. QW is ownage, haha she apparently watched all three. I didn't do too badly, two out of three. :D Ghost Town was simply too draggy :S and I was getting sleepy. Haha. But 21 was really cool. :D

Okay so that was the narrative aspect of this post actually. Haha.

I kinda have a list of things to buy for tomorrow. Haha. Oops. Cardholders. :D And my online orders are going to set me back by around, $300 at least, with all those CDs and what nots. Goodness gracious. It shall be kept from my mum. :S

I'm getting kinda bored by this post actually, so I can't imagine how bored you, reading this, will be. :S Too bad.

Fine. Happy 2010, peoples! :D